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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23156437">A slip of the hand</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/serenitysolstice/pseuds/serenitysolstice'>serenitysolstice</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wicked - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Fake Dating, Fake Marriage, Friends to Lovers, inspired by a post from fndmhellspawngirl on tumblr, kinda ooc i think, though really that's canon for these two isn't it</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 11:40:09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>15,599</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23156437</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/serenitysolstice/pseuds/serenitysolstice</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Galinda gets so into writing her dream signature that she accidentally signs a letter to her parents with a new surname. So now Momsie thinks she's engaged. Brilliant.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Elphaba Thropp/Galinda Upland</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>198</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Mistakes, and ideas.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div class="reblog-content">
  <p>It was an accident. Just a slip of the wrist, nothing to be overly concerned about. She’d been writing to Elphie all summer, and now, first week back at Shiz, the surname is just there, at the tip of her pen waiting to etch its way into her letters.</p>
  <p>Or maybe it had something to do with the signature practice she’d been doing recently.</p>
  <p>Either way, the letter from her mother shook damnably in her hand while she processed her mistake, and what she could do about it.</p>
  <p>That was how Elphie found her; sat at the vanity, letter shaking in her hand.</p>
  <p>“What’s the matter?” She asked immediately, sinking to her knees at once. “Galinda? What’s happened?”</p>
  <p>“Oh, um, nothing really. I’m just a little…shaken. Had a letter from my mother.”</p>
  <p>“Is everything all right at home?” Concern laced her roommate’s voice, but it just made her feel sick to her stomach. How long would that concern last, she wondered.</p>
  <p>“Yes, yes, everyone’s fine. Well, Popsie had a little bit of a stumble out on the farm but he wasn’t hurt.”</p>
  <p>“Then…what’s got you all…” Elphaba trailed off with a gesture to Galinda, slumped forwards facing away from her mirror.</p>
  <p>“Oh, just a silly little mistake in my letter that’s got my parents all in a tizzy! Don’t worry yourself about it Elphie, it’s nothing.” Galinda tried to move from her stool, to get away from those piercing eyes. How she wished she could just…not talk about her problems!</p>
  <p>“Galinda.” Elphaba said, a firm grip on her knee holding her in place. “We both know that until whatever situation you’ve gotten yourself in is over, you’re going to be moping and miserable and, probably, burst with the pressure of trying to keep it from me. And, as they say, a problem shared is a problem halved. I might be able to help. But I can’t if you won’t let me.”</p>
  <p>Galinda took a deep breath, and closed her eyes so she didn’t have to see what those expressive brown irises thought of her. Then she replied.</p>
  <p>“I signed the last letter to my parents with your name.”</p>
  <p>“You-what? Why? You signed a letter to your parents with ‘Elphaba Thropp?” Galinda laughed, a sharp bark that did nothing to hide her panic.</p>
  <p>“No, not quite. I signed it Galinda Thropp.” Elphaba dropped to the floor, mouth formed into a perfect 'o’.</p>
  <p>“So they think-”</p>
  <p>“That I’m married. Yes.” Her head looked up sharply, eyes wide.</p>
  <p>“To me?” Galinda winced.</p>
  <p>“Not exactly. Obviously they know of the eminency, but nothing of your family. They think I’m married to A Thropp. They don’t know that the only Thropp I’ve met is, well, you.”</p>
  <p>“And how exactly did this accident occur? I presume you aren’t scrawling my name on everything you can find.” Ha ha ha ha, no of course not, that would have been silly, she hadn’t been doing that since before the Summer started!</p>
  <p>“I can only assume that I’ve been writing to you so often this summer that your surname just falls naturally off the tip of my pen.” Galinda said, praying the lie didn’t sound as flimsy to Elphaba’s ears. Though to be fair, she had always been an exceptional liar.</p>
  <p>“I suppose so.” Elphaba muttered. She frowned for several minutes. “What exactly does the letter say? If I may read it - just so we know how best to handle the situation.” Galinda handed the letter over wordlessly.</p>
  <p>
    <em>Dearest Galinda, </em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>Frankly I am astounded that you spent three paragraphs on your reunion with your roommate, and gave us only a hasty signature to indicate your new engagement! I had hoped we’d raised you better than that.</em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>But congratulations my dear, on securing yourself a Thropp - he must be second or third descending at least - though I do hope the change to your signature is simply excitement for your new betrothed rather than because you are already married. Your father and I shall be very disappointed if we do not have the chance to organise and attend your wedding which, I’m sure, you must want as grand and beautiful as possible. </em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>Regarding your father, his ankle is worse, and we fear a fracture. He’s doing well, a little grouchy to be inside during the last good weeks of the year, but otherwise in good spirits. Percivall thinks he’ll be right as rain in eight weeks or so. </em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>Do write us again soon Darling, we want to hear all about your fiancé! </em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>All our love, </em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>Momsie and Popsicle</em>
  </p>
  <p>Elphaba looked back at Galinda.</p>
  <p>“They call themselves Momsie and popsicle?” Despite everything, Galinda smiled.</p>
  <p>“You don’t think a well adjusted child comes up with that on their own, do you?”</p>
  <p>“You think you were well adjusted?” Her tone held no bite, and Galinda laughed. “To the matter at hand - it doesn’t sound as though they’ve really done anything but wait for more details from you, if you wanted, you could just tell them the truth.”</p>
  <p>“Absolutely not.” Galinda replied at once. “It doesn’t sound that way, but I assure you, they’ll have told my aunt and uncles, my grandmother and all of the parents of my childhood friends, because none of them are married yet, and it would reflect very well indeed on my mother’s parenting.”</p>
  <p>She could see every step of the announcement route, the champagne bottles in the back of the car so that her father could pop a new one at each house and pretent it was their first stop. Her mother delicately dabbing at fake tears from the corner of her eyes, mournfully lamenting 'they grow up so fast’.</p>
  <p>“No. I cannot tell her the truth.”</p>
  <p>“No, I was afraid of that.” Elphaba nodded calmly. “Very well, but I really don’t think you’ll like this.” Galinda thought she saw Elphaba’s upper lip twitch, though her face remained relaxed.</p>
  <p>“What is it?” she prompted. “Elphie, short of changing my name and running away, I’ll try anything. I may even try that if I can get far enough - do you think Quadling country is easy to -”</p>
  <p>“Marry me.”</p>
  <p>“Excuse me?!” Galinda responded instinctively. Elphaba at least had the decency to blush.</p>
  <p>“Not - not really. Don’t actually marry me. Just pretend to. Until the whole fiasco is over. Then we have a horrible break up a week before the wedding, or a really amicable divorce, or something along those lines.”</p>
  <p>“Elphie, thank you but I really don’t -” She was thrilled when her roommate cut her off, because she had no idea how that sentence was going to end.</p>
  <p>“Look. I’m a Thropp. I’m your friend. And I’ve got the feeling that I’m not the kind of person your mother had in mind when she wrote that letter. Maybe seeing me will convince her to be less…public about the whole affair. And we can go back to our lives.”</p>
  <p>Galinda won’t pretend she hadn’t dreamed of the question - it was what caused this whole fiasco in the first place. So, despite herself, her friendship with Elphaba and the deep seated respect she had for the other woman, she couldn’t help the butterflies that had settled low in her stomach, nor the brief but warm smile that flashed across her face when she replied.</p>
  <p>“Okay Elphie. I’ll marry you.”</p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Step One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The first step was the dating.</p>
<p>Actually, the first step was to reply to her mother's letter.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first step was the dating.</p>
<p>Actually the first step was to reply to her mother's letter. That was difficult enough; Galinda often struggled to say what she wanted in a reasonable amount of paper, but now she struggled to bulk out the couple of sentences of substance.</p>
<p>"Don't tell her I'm me just yet." Elphaba advised. "If she's going to leave you alone after this whole mess is over, we want that reveal to be as shocking as possible. No, avoid pronouns and gender and, I guess, skin colour entirely."</p>
<p>Which left the first draft of her letter looking rather sparse:</p>
<p>Dear Momsie,</p>
<p>Oh, I am sorry for not telling you properly, we thought it would be simply too funny if we kept things as quiet as possible until Lurlinmas - you know as well as I do that I won't be able to come home until then! But this time, obviously, I'll have a plus one!</p>
<p>We're trying not to make a big deal out of it here either, which is why I said nothing over the Summer, and I would appreciate it if you didn't mention to too many people at home either. The last thing either of us need is that level of publicity while trying to finish the year!</p>
<p>If she left it another week, she could bulk out the letter with mundane details about her class and friends. The antics of Crope and Tibbett alone warrented nearly a page a week! But she didn't want to delay, and risk her mother telling every single person in their social circle. She supposed another day wouldn't hurt, and she really did need the content for the letter. </p>
<p>The real first step, the one that had anxiety coiled tightly in her stomach since the original idea was proposed, was to set an outline with Elphaba for how to convice everyone they knew that they were going to get married. And the boundaries set between them, which Elphaba was more nervous for than Galinda, though she didn't know how that was possible.</p>
<p>"I understand that PDA is unavoidable." She began matter-of-factly. She was facing Galinda, each on their beds, though the blonde kept her eyes on the floor nervously. Her mouth felt dry, and she didn't trust her throat to speak clearly, so she kept quiet. "Hand-holding and hugs we already have down, though you probably want to do that more often around people like Pfannee and Shenshen, rather than just the boys." Galinda nodded, though privately thought that, since the boys (particularly Crope and Tibbett, and notably excluding Boq) were constantly making jokes alluding to the true nature of their friendship, that perhaps they were better targets for the lie than Pfannee and Shenshen, who had grown up around girls constantly showing affection with other girls. Elphaba went on. "Now, about kissing."</p>
<p>"K-kissing?" Galinda stammered, and hated herself for it. Elphaba raised a single eyebrow at the blonde.</p>
<p>"Yes, Glin. Kissing. If you want people to believe we could ever actually be engaged, you'll need to be comfortable kissing me."</p>
<p>"What if we're just...not very public about that?" Her voice was weak to even her own ears, but this was going too far. Elphaba didn't know just how real her feelings were for her: she couldn't kiss her roommate and not feel anything, and that had to be a betrayal of some kind, surely! </p>
<p>"We go down to the pub twice a week. You're beyond tipsy after a full pint, and the biggest flirt I've ever met. If you drink alcohol and aren't a little touchy feely with me, no one's going to believe us." She knew Elphaba was right, but this was a step she wasn't sure she should cross. </p>
<p>"I don't know, Elphie." She said, casting her mind around for anything at all to stop this. "Do you even know how to kiss?" Brown eyes went cold for a moment, before she shrugged and rolled her eyes.</p>
<p>"I've always been a fast learner. And I'm sure you'll be an excellent teacher."</p>
<p>"We can't! It would be too weird, you're my friend."</p>
<p>"Galinda. Need I remind you why we're doing this at all? Because you, for some inexplicable reason signed with my surname in a letter to your mother. So unless you're going to tell her the truth or come up with a better idea, I suggest you get used to the plan real quick. Besides, it's not like I planned my first kiss to be under false pretences either." </p>
<p>"But I-" Galinda trailed off, humbled. She was right; Elphaba was doing her a huge favour. And if they were doing this, it had to be 100% believable. Elphaba was willing to do whatever it took. She should be too. "You're right. God, don't be annoying about it!" She huffed at Elphaba's smug smile, the one she knew was saved especially for when she could prove Galinda wrong. "But if that is the case, that is, you are going to kiss me, and I'm going to kiss you, it needs to look natural. And like we've done it dozens of times before."</p>
<p>"We should practice." Elphaba said casually. "That's what you mean, right?" Galinda ignored the lump in her throat, and stealthily wiped her sweating palms on her dress.</p>
<p>"Yes." Elphaba crossed the two meters to sit besides Galinda. </p>
<p>"Now?" She asked, her voice quiet. She didn't seem nervous. Galinda wasn't sure if that was better or worse.</p>
<p>"Well, tommorrow we need to be pretty good at this, so yes, now." Elphaba nodded. She cupped Galinda's cheek, their foreheads resting together, noses bumping. </p>
<p>"This is your first kiss?" Galinda asked, her voice barely a whisper in the hush that had fallen over them, afraid of breaking the tension between them. </p>
<p>"Yes." Elphaba breathed back. Her hand was soft and cool against Galinda's cheek; in that instant, she forgot about the fears that had plagued her moments ago. She forgot that this wasn't real, that it was aimed specifically at pissing off her parents, that Elphaba was nothing more than a really good friend who would obviously help her with anything. She didn't think at all. There was the hand brushing its thumb over her skin, and the furious pounding of her own heartbeat, and the heady heat of her desire. She wanted to kiss Elphaba. </p>
<p>So she did.</p>
<p>It was gentle, and it was quick, and when it was over, she couldn't hold back her grin. Elphaba's lips were impossibly soft, and the way her eyes stayed closed after Galinda pulled back, her dark lips parted slightly, made Galinda's heart skip a beat. Okay. So she could kiss Elphaba without spontaneously combusting. That was good to know.</p>
<p>"Well, that wasn't so bad, was it?" Elphaba asked, single eyebrow raised. Galinda wondered if it was just naturally like that. </p>
<p>"I suppose not." She replied shyly, unable to meet brown eyes. She wished it had affected Elphaba in any way; it would be easier to do this if her own attraction wasn't entirely one-sided. "Though," She added, before she could censor her own tongue. "If it needs to look so practiced and so easy, you need to be able to kiss me too. And we should probably work on catching each other by surprise - I don't want you to have a heart attack every time I touch you." Elphie rolled her eyes. </p>
<p>"I'm not that bad!" Galinda only looked at her, remembering the incident with the mug of tea. "Okay, fine. We can work on that across tomorrow."</p>
<p>"You really seem to know what you're doing." Galinda mused. She didn't expect Elphaba to flush so intensely, but delighted in the burgundy blush spreading across her face. </p>
<p>"Well, of course." She replied quickly. "You're my friend, and I know how embarrassing this whole farce is for you already - the least I can do is be the big green embarrassment you need me to be." Galinda opened her mouth to deny her claim, to tell her that she didn't find her embarrassing - at least not anymore - and that anyone would be lucky to have Elphaba (meaning her. She would be beyond lucky to have Elphaba for real, instead of in this ridiculous scenario), but Elphaba seemed to laugh at her own self-decrecation. "Lord knows I've been training for this all my life. And if it pisses off a couple of homophobes, even better."</p>
<p>That. That one statement there threw Galinda off. She spent the rest of the evening with that sentence buzzing around in her skull, bouncing from braincell to braincell in an attempt to analyse every possible meaning of the words. </p>
<p>Is she actually...or does she just stand strongly with them? Would she, could she, be interested in...The half thoughts were all she let herself hope, because Galinda knew that liking other girls (one other girl in particular) and liking a single specific girl were two very different things. She was probably just an ally. She was always fighting for one cause or another, maybe she was just a staunch supporter of them, that was all. And this didn't need to add another complicated element to the dramatic shift in their friendship that this plot was inevitably going to cause. </p>
<p>Sure.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. All eyes on us</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>When she said she could kiss Elphaba without spontaneously combusting, she hadn't assumed to worry about the reverse.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Grabbing her hand as they strolled from their room to the dining hall: natural. Elphaba pointing out the table with Boq and Crope and Fiyero already sat down while she queued for the blonde's breakfast: natural. Elphaba grabbing at her hand and pulling her close, purple lips meeting pink, before shooting her a dopey grin and getting into line: Galinda's heart stopped beating. </p><p>Not that the kiss surprised her; they had spent often enough together last night (almost uncomfortably so, Galinda's stomach still flooded with warmth if she thought on it too long) practising, and she felt reasonably familiar around her roommate's lips. No, it was the casual ease with how Elphaba handled her, like nothing had changed overnight, like kissing Galinda in public was something she did all the time. She fought to modulate the pace she walked at, ignoring the sensation that everyone's eyes were on her. Though, to be fair to herself, everyone's eyes WERE on her; not many people had the nerve to get up close and personal to Elphaba, she knew. And they were both well known around the university. It was just the next hurdle in making this lie convincing, she knew. She could handle this.</p><p>"Morning boys!" She said with a smile, settling down into the seat opposite Fiyero. She took their muttered "Mornin'." as confirmation that they hadn't noticed Elphie's stunt, probably still half asleep. Then she saw Tibbet, two trays in tow, cross over to their table, grin on his face and a gleam in his eye. Oh well. Let the chaos begin.</p><p>"So, my dear friends." He began, stood at the head of the table, his palms flat on the wooden top. Galinda winced; she should have known he'd never chat quietly and stick to gossip. "I propose a thought experiment! How close must two friends be to start kissing each other in broad daylight?" </p><p>"That depends," Crope replied, taking his tray with one eyebrow arched. "How close are we?" Fiyero snorted, and Galinda couldn't keep her own laugh in, though her heart raced and her leg bounced incessantly underneath the table. She wished he'd just get it over with. </p><p>"And, furthermore," Tibbet continued, passing his gaze over the table dramatically, though he shot a wink to Galinda as he did so. "Where should one draw the line between friendship and romance?" He waited expectantly, but the table remained silent. As if fate itself had decided to punish Galinda for sins, known and unknown, Elphaba arrived with their breakfast, skirting around Tibbet to sit next to Galinda. </p><p>"Ah, Miss Elphaba, you're just in time!" He said, amused grin renewed at her arrival. "We were just discussing the difference between platonic friendships and those with a ...deeper nature." His eyes twinkled. "Unfortunately, no one here seems particularly interested," Here his gaze turned, once more, to Galinda, who blushed under the scrutiny. "Perhaps you'd deign to share your own wisdom in such matters?" He gestured over to her and took his seat beside Crope. All eyes were on Elphaba and, thought Galinda was sure she could see a faint purple across her cheeks, she didn't seem particularly perturbed.</p><p>"Well, that would surely depend on how you define intimacy, first and foremost, and how it differs to platonic relationships. Some friendships -" She indicated the two young men in front of her, the pair of whom started giggling. "Seem to transcend any definable boundaries. And some relationships appear, to me at least, to be little more than friendships made grand beyond their time." </p><p>"And how," Tibbet asked between giggles. "Would you define your relationship to Miss Galinda?" There it was, the blonde thought anxiously. Nothing for it now, clear the air, get it out, and let's move on with our lives. But Elphaba, as was her wont to do, surprised Galinda.</p><p>"Well..." She started slowly, as though she were thinking carefully. "I must confess I don't understand the standard bonds between young women any more than any other kind of kinship between two people. I won't argue, I think the borders of our friendship lay somewhere on that fuzzy line that Tibbet mentioned, don't you think?" She turned to Galinda, who honestly hadn't expected to be asked her opinion. </p><p>"Oh! Um, yes. Well, I must confess, I've certainly never had a friendship with anyone else quite like you." She couldn't meet brown eyes, afraid of what they'd see in her own, and her cheeks felt horribly warm. </p><p>"What about you fellas? Would you say that kissing, in a crowded breakfast hall, could fall into the category of friendship?" </p><p>"Not at all!" Fiyero said, a single eyebrow raised. "Why, that level of comfort could only be achieved along the process of courtship." </p><p>"Fairly far into the process too, I'd say," Crope added. "There's an intimacy to ignoring the world around a couple that cannot be reached overnight." Galinda wanted to laugh. Or cry. Or scream to the three of them that she knew that, she knew how comfortable she was around Elphaba, she knew it transgressed the bounds of friendship and strayed deep into impropriety. Instead, she bit her tongue and fought to keep a smile off her face when Elphaba's hand found hers under the table. </p><p>"My thoughts exactly, gentlemen. So if, say, one witnessed a woman kiss her supposed friend, in such a public spot -"</p><p>"You absolute menace," Elphaba growled, though there was no real venom in her tone. "I ought to have known you'd make a bigger deal out of everything than necessary. Yes, fine, Galinda and I are together." </p><p>Galinda had expected laughs of disbelief, or outraged cries, or even a congratulatory high five from Crope or Tibbett. What she did not expect was Fiyero to roll his eyes, Crope to groan loudly and Tibbett to grin triumphantly. </p><p>"I told the pair of you! Pay up, suckers!"</p><p>"Wait, what?!" Galinda exclaimed, bringing her right hand down firmly on the table. "Pay up what? Fiyero!" He had the good grace to look humble, at least.</p><p>"Tibbett bet us each twenty bucks he could make you admit a relationship between the two of you."</p><p>"And you took it?!" Fiyero held up his hands defensively.</p><p>"In my defence, I didn't think there was anything to admit! You guys did a great job keeping it under wraps."</p><p>"Only because you're a worse drunk than Galinda is!" Crope admonished, slapping down a handful of bills irritably. "You never see Galinda half-carried home from the Peach and Kidney weekly, trying to press kisses to Elphaba's neck." Her face was burning now, though offered her a little relief to see Elphaba's own purple blush spread across her cheeks. </p><p>"I, for one, am glad to hear that." Galinda offered, her voice (thankfully) no different to usual. "At least someone can spare me from some embarrassment." She ignored the boys giggling, and focused on Fiyero's long stare as he contemplated her. After a long pause, he broke out into a grin.</p><p>"Well, I'm happy for you. Both of you." He said, raising a glass of orange juice. "And, for what it's worth, it's about bloody time!" That had all three of them laughing. Galinda shared a glance with Elphaba, hand still tightly grasped in her own. She should be worried about how easy that was for them to believe, right? Maybe she had been too obvious, and everyone knew how she felt. Though that would help with the lie...but...did Elphaba know how she felt? Would she have proposed such a ridiculous scheme if she did? Had she accidentally manipulated her best friend into being in a relationship with her? As a soft thumb ran its way back and forth over her knuckles, she struggled to keep her smile warm and her breath regular, even as her blood turned to ice.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Half truths and whole truths</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Elphie." She whispered. She nodded back, strand of dark hair falling from its tight braid. "Elphie. I'm gay."</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Whoa, sorry this one's longer than the last few. I actually meant for chapter 5 to be this one, but it didn't fit properly, so its going up after this one instead. Which means, for the First Time Ever, I'm one chapter ahead in a fanfiction!</p>
<p>Also: trigger warning for an anxiety attack, internalized homophoia, and a brief mention of mathematics.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Even before her carelessness had brought about such a dramatic change in their interactions, Galinda had spent more than enough time marvelling at how Elphaba’s hand felt in her own. Her skin didn’t have that coarse dry texture of any man she knew, but neither was it as perfectly soft as her own, well treated palms. Elphaba’s skin was smooth, was firm, was always just a few degrees<br/>cooler than her, was far from unblemished, and fit so perfectly with her fingers entwined in long, green digits that Galinda had always taken any opportunity that presented itself to firmly take Elphaba in her hand. Sometimes it took everything in her to let go when propriety demanded it.</p>
<p>Elphaba didn’t let go of her hand at any point during the day. She told herself it was the pretence, that they would look a very odd couple indeed, kissing at breakfast and then not touching each other for the whole day. Still a small, secret part of her relaxed in the comfort the contact gave, and pretended (imagined? Hoped?) that was the intended effect all along.</p>
<p>She didn’t want to lose everything she’d already built with Elphaba for the sake of protecting herself from embarrassment.</p>
<p>“Breathe.” Came the low whisper from her left. Elphaba hadn’t looked at her, brown eyes still solidly focused on the chalkboard and the formulae upon it. It didn’t surprise her one bit to learn that Elphaba had equally appalling handwriting with her left hand as her right. She sighed heavily, feigning the long drag of air inwards, and ignored that her lungs ached with relief. Elphaba didn’t need to know she was right. Again.</p>
<p>“Smartass.” Her friend said. “You’ve missed half the lecture, where’s your head gone?” All two of her braincells were focused on the shared heat of their palms, tucked together under the long desk, but that was something else Elphaba didn’t need to know.</p>
<p>“I just think it’s stupid. When am I going to need to know that something is ho-hom-homeo-”</p>
<p>“Homeomorphic. It means, basically, that one object can be considered the same as another. Like the letters A and R, for example.”</p>
<p>“See? Why is that even in the general mathematics syllabus? They’re nothing alike anyway, I don’t understand.” She was playing, and Elphaba knew it. Long past were the days where Galinda didn’t bother to study something just because she didn’t see the point. Still, Elphaba turned to her (finally!) and with one perfect eyebrow arched, replied.</p>
<p>“Are you sure about that? Some of the most successful sorcerers in history were excellent topologists.”</p>
<p>“Really?!” She couldn’t help her excitement, but upon drawing the attention of the rows around them, schooled her expression immediately to something more neutral. Elphaba’s eyes sparkled, amused.</p>
<p>“Not in the slightest. Now pay attention.” She chuckled at Galinda’s excuse for a thump on the shoulder, but the blonde dutifully turned her attention to the board, and tried to pick up on the last hour of the lecture with...limited success.</p>
<p><br/>When the pair of them were safely returned to their room, free period before dinner, Galinda flopped onto her mattress and sighed, exaggerating the stretch somewhat.</p>
<p>“I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted.”</p>
<p>“Yes, not paying attention for five hours straight will do that to a girl.” Elphaba mused drily, already pulling out her biology textbook. Galinda had finally been released from biology, on the condition that she pickup metaphysics in order to supplement her sorcery classes, so she rolled her<br/>eyes at the tome.</p>
<p>“Don’t tell me you’ve got a paper already? We’ve been back one day!”</p>
<p>“Summer project. Professor had to sign for the textbook.” Galinda supposed she should have been lucky to receive any kind of reply. That should have been the end of the conversation, would have been, if they were still the Galinda and Elphaba that parted ways before the summer. But they’d spent the last week almost exclusively in each other’s company, and the last eighteen hours in such close contact Galinda was surprised her roommate didn’t smell like her perfume, and Galinda wanted to talk to her friend.</p>
<p>“Must be some project, to warrant the restricted books.”</p>
<p>“I’m investigating the nature of souls: do we have them, where could they be located in the body, do they differ in men and women, are they different from species to species. Some of the research is...not friendly to sensitive eyes. Hence, restricted books.” Galinda’s eyebrows shot right up, and she crossed the distance to the desk.</p>
<p>“Pardon me, but what do you mean, insensitive? Surely not anything...violent?” Elphaba laughed, and turned the book towards her.</p>
<p>“No, nothing quite like that. It’s...well...rather sensually drawn, but its really just human anatomy.” She squinted at the book, trying to make sense of what she was...oh. Oh. That was...Galinda flushed from head to toe. She turned the book back to Elphaba, mouth dry.</p>
<p>“Oh my. Yes, I think I see what you mean. I’ll...I’ll just...” She trailed off, hands twisting in front of her. Elphaba laughed again.</p>
<p>“What’s got you all in a twist? Don’t tell me that’s the first time you’ve seen a woman naked.”</p>
<p>“Elphaba Thropp!” Galinda exclaimed, face burning. “I’ve never - that is to say, it isn’t - we don’t - that kind of thing doesn’t exactly come up in conversation in Gillikin.” Elphaba’s mouth parted in a small ‘o’, and her cheeks darkened. Good. Galinda felt she shouldn’t be the only one blushing, with a picture of a woman so scandalously spread open laying on the desk.</p>
<p>“I...just meant my mother...she had a terrible habit of wearing as little as possible...I didn’t realise that you...” Oh god. Galinda’s blood went cold, and she could taste bile in the back of her throat.</p>
<p>“I - after all this I just -” but her throat had closed over. Her mind screaming at her to do something, to say something, but she just stuttered incoherently.</p>
<p>“Galinda, I need you to breathe for me.” Elphaba’s voice sounded far away. Her head swam.</p>
<p>“Glin, deep breathe in for me, can you manage that?” She shook her head fiercely, but forced her mouth to take a shuddering gasp of a breath. The next one came easier, the tight pressure in her chest lessened, and the thrumming of her blood in her head faded. She noticed a pressure on her cheeks, forced her eyes to focus on the green blob swimming before her. Elphaba. Her purple lips had stretched into a relieved smile, one firm thumb wiped at a tear forming in the corner of her eye.</p>
<p>“Elphie.” She whispered. She nodded back, strand of dark hair falling from its tight braid. “Elphie. I’m gay.” The words were barely out in the air before the tightness in her chest was back.</p>
<p>But then strong arms wrapped around her, pulling her tight to Elphaba, who rocked them both.</p>
<p>“I’m gay.” She whispered again into her shoulder. “I’m gay and I should have told you, before all this, when we started being friends, when we started being roommates. You’re not going to want to be my friend, I’ll have to l-let my parents down and I’ll be all alone again.” The tears fell freely. Elphaba knew. Elphaba knew and now she’d know just how horrible Galinda had been in accepting Elphaba’s plan. She’d know Galinda had been using her, taking advantage of her for just trying to help her friend, and...</p>
<p>And Elphaba was rubbing her back, was calmly hushing her, had slowed her own breathing so Galinda could mirror it. She relaxed into the hold a little, letting her eyes burn with the sting of the last tears, and only when her breathing had evened out did Elphaba pull away.</p>
<p>“You’ve done nothing wrong.” Galinda blinked.</p>
<p>“But. But I-”</p>
<p>“Glin. Listen to me. You’ve done nothing wrong. There’s nothing to have done wrong.”</p>
<p>“But I’m gay, Elphie! And I’ve tricked you into this whole pretend engagement thing, and what if I’ve just been manipulating you this entire time!” Elphaba looked disconcertingly calm.</p>
<p>“Have you”</p>
<p>“Have I what?”</p>
<p>“Have you been manipulating me? Into pretending to date you?” Galinda felt dizzy.</p>
<p>“Well no, not intentionally, but what if -”</p>
<p>“If you aren’t doing it intentionally, you aren’t manipulating me. Besides, this was my idea! You’ve been fairly reluctant about every step, although that certainly makes sense now. But I promise you Galinda, I wouldn’t be doing this if I didn’t want to help.” Galinda nodded shakily then, on catching the steel behind Elphaba’s eyes, nodded again more confidently.</p>
<p>“I’ve done nothing wrong.” Elphaba smiled as she spoke.</p>
<p>“Does it help you to know I had my suspicions?” Elphaba asked then, when Galinda’s face plummetted, added. “Only since yesterday! Don’t worry, no one would have guessed. Except, I suppose, everyone who thinks we’re together.”</p>
<p>Oh right. Somehow, Galinda had forgotten that<br/>that part of the plan (that part of the plan being the whole damn thing) would out her to literally everyone they knew. And out Elphaba too, she supposed, though she doubted Elphaba minded pretending to come out. Enough of the school had thought her that way before anyway.</p>
<p>"What - what gave me away?” She asked, all nerves again. Was her attraction to Elphaba, specifically, too obvious.</p>
<p>“You didn’t mention having to pretend to be gay once when I suggested it. I know you. You absolutely would have made a big deal out of that if, well...” Elphaba trailed off, shrugging a little. “I wasn’t going to say anything.” Galinda felt her eyes water again. Somehow, she had bagged herself the best possible friend under the sun, and she’d spent two semesters completely unaware<br/>of the fact.</p>
<p>“What on earth would I do without you?” She asked, pulling Elphaba back to her for a real hug. Elphaba pretended to think for a moment.</p>
<p>“You’d probably scape passes in all your classes, end up married to a rich man who died under mysterious circumstances and live out the rest of your days a wealthy widow with a great many ‘lady’s companions’.” She felt, rather than heard, Elphaba’s snicker, and thumped her on the back with a roll of her eyes.</p>
<p>She wasn’t sure she was comfortable enough with the idea of joking about<br/>her sexuality, but Elphaba had never been one to let a little thing like propriety stop her. And knowing Elphaba was still comfortable enough to be her friend helped immensely.</p>
<p>Hopefully that was still the case the next time they had to kiss.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Pivot</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The secret's out. Galinda doesn't know what's worse - Pfannee and Shenshen knowing, or their invitation to the pub.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Fun fact: I hate this chapter. I hated writing it, I hated reading it, and I hate that I can't come up with a better way for the story to progress. So I can do nothing but apologise.</p>
<p>I'm sorry.</p>
<p>Edit: just noticed that Galinda was reading a biology paper (despite having dropped the subject) in the beginning of the chapter, and a history paper at the end. Oops!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It surprised her just how easy it was to date Elphaba. Though the stares didn’t lessen, nobody asked her outright what was going on, not even when she leaned up to her tiptoes to press a kiss to her roommate’s cheek in the middle of the courtyard, shortly before they parted ways for the afternoon (not even a real relationship could convince Galinda to spend a sunny afternoon cooped up in the library), in plain view of anyone who wished to watch.</p>
<p>Perhaps the change wasn’t as drastic as it felt; it’s one thing to know their dynamics had changed, on the outside at least. It was quite another for her peers to recognise the difference between two friends holding hands, and a couple doing the same. Maybe Tibbett had been onto something regarding the friendship - relationship line.</p>
<p>Of course, it helped that she’d taken to avoiding public spaces as much as possible, moving quickly to classes without her usual ambling conversation with whichever friendship group she found herself with. She felt too tightly wound, too anxious and too sickeningly overwhelmed to play the happy little socialite role she usually occupied, particularly as her new act had a lot more riding on it. No doubt the change would be attributed to Elphaba, and she wondered if rumours of the green girl ‘bewitching’ her had started to spread. She wouldn’t put it past some of the utter imbeciles she spent time with.</p>
<p>And then they found her. Pfannee and Shenshen. Her back to a tree, Elphaba’s coat keeping the dirt off her dress, she studied in the early autumn sunshine, and when she glanced up for a moment to rest her eyes from the tiny text of a history textbook, they had appeared suddenly, crossing the grass and making a beeline straight for her. She rolled her head back against the bark and closed her eyes. The reprieve from their dull, insipid conversations had been brief, but welcome.</p>
<p>“Galinda? Is that you?” Pfannee called out, waving a hand towards the blonde. She wanted to groan. Of course it was her, and of course they knew that. That was why they approached so quickly.</p>
<p>“Pfannee! And Shenshen too! How are you both?” They exchanged plesantries, the small talk only serving to further twist the snakes in her stomach. Any second now...</p>
<p>“We feel as though we’ve hardly seen you this year! Been keeping busy?” Shenshen asked, her voice casual, but the gleam in her eyes betrayed her. And so it began.</p>
<p>“Oh yes, well, you know how it is. We’ve got our majors to pick and settle into, and there’s still all of the other subjects to handle, and my history certainly did not improve over the summer. But what about you, what are you thinking of doing?”</p>
<p>“Oh, I’ve no real idea yet, I’m still bouncing between ideas. But, surely even with your nose in all of those books, you’ve heard the most ghastly rumours spreading about you?”</p>
<p>“Rumours?” She asked, stretching her lips into an amused smile she didn’t remotely feel. “What kinds of rumours?”</p>
<p>“Only the most awful rumours! Naturally, we had to find you as soon as possible to get them all straightened out - you know how the rabble like to tear down the great and the good.” Galinda didn’t point out that they’d been back in school for nearly a week already, and that if they really wanted to seek her out, it wouldn’t have been hard to arrive to classes on time, for once. Instead, she offered them a high pitched giggle.</p>
<p>“Well what have they been saying about me? Surely it can’t be that bad if I’ve heard nothing about it.”</p>
<p>“They say -” Pfannee began, then lowered her voice to a hissed whisper. “They say you’ve been seen in the...the company of one Miss Elphaba Thropp.” The impulse was there for a fraction of a second to make the announcement easy on them, to just explain that she and Elphaba were dating, and finally never have to listen to them whinge and complain about nothing again. Alternatively...</p>
<p>“Well of course I have! Don’t you remember she joined our social circle at the end of last semester, along with Boq and those two boys he’s always hanging around - Crope and Tibbett. She’s actually rather interesting, you know.” The pair blanched.</p>
<p>“And when was the last time you kissed a <em>friend</em>?” Shenshen asked coolly. “Because that’s been making the rounds as well. That you’re not just in the company of her, but she’s actively courting you.”</p>
<p>“Does that matter?” Galinda asked, folding her arms. She leaned back against the tree, feigning a calm she didn’t feel. “Friends, companions, lovers. The line between the three blurs so nicely, I find.” She shot the gaping girls a half smile, head tilted in what she hoped looked like bemusement. “Sometimes one finds oneself stepping from one intimacy to another without noticing the line at all.”</p>
<p>“You mean, it’s true?”</p>
<p>“It is.” The girls clutched at each other, eyes wide.</p>
<p>“You and the green bean?” Galinda couldn’t say what caused the change that overcame her. Later, when she looked back on the conversation, laying in bed full of a dozen regrets, she’d attribute it to her own indignation on Elphaba’s behalf. At that moment, her anxieties stilled, her mind cleared, and a calm confidence in her relationship with Elphaba overtook her. This was the hardest part, she remembered. These two would be the hardest. Her half smile grew into a full smirk.</p>
<p>“How much detail did you want?” Their horrified expressions had her laughing, perhaps cruelly, but she found she couldn’t bring herself to care. If this farce was going to change everything, then let it first change her.</p>
<p>“Galinda, really! What will everyone say? Have you lost your head?” Pfannee, ever the pragmatic one, asked. Shenshen merely shook her head over and over again, like she couldn’t believe it. Well. Galinda couldn’t have that, the whole idea was to be believed.</p>
<p>“I would hope to know you both well enough that your problem can’t be that I’m gay. Obviously, you’re two adult women who know better than to think less of me for something as mundane as that.” Galinda ignored that her hands trembed, and that she felt sick to her stomach. She instead focused on the way their eyes went wide, and their mouths opened, though neither managed to find anything to say. She’d caught them off guard. Again. “Which means your issue must be with Elphie herself. Though what kinds of friends must you be to reject to a match with Munchkinland royalty! She’s intelligent, she’s funny, she cares so fiercely about everyone and everything, and you find yourselves horrified because she’s green and has a rather...acquired personality.” Pfannee opened her mouth, eyebrows furrowed, to retort, but Shenshen elbowed her and shook her head.</p>
<p>“Of course, if you really are...with her,” Galinda ignored the way she forced the words out like they physically pained her. “Then we must apologise for giving you grief over the matter. You’ll still join us for drinks tomorrow?”</p>
<p>“Oh, bring Elphaba too, of course! It might help to...get to know her a bit.” Pfannee added with a smile that she didn't believe for a half second. Galinda fought a frown. This felt too easy, they were letting it go too easily. What had she missed?</p>
<p>“Of course, I’ll mention it to her! Either way, I’d be happy to come.” They didn’t pick up on her lie, for which she was immensely grateful. She’d feel foolish if she got away with dating Elphaba, and slipped up on a social obligation she’d lied her way through dozens of times in the past. The pair left soon after that, still oddly calm and charming, citing a paper that neither of them had done over the holiday. She slumped back onto the coat, suddenly too exhausted to catch up with the history reading she’d been already struggling with. Well, maybe Elphaba would help her.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Oh my! Guys, I'm overwhelmed at the love you've shown this fic! I rarely make it this far into a project and want to keep it going, but I'm having so much fun writing this and it's entirely down to you being such a sweet crowd to write for. </p>
<p>A special shout out to two-gay-witches on tumblr for sending me the sweetest message about this fic while I was asleep - it honest to god fuelled this entire chapter! You've got a bit of a longer chapter today, as my thank you.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I’m not so sure about this.” Galinda whispered, her hands clutched tight around Elphaba’s bicep.The Peach and Kidneys wasn’t exactly the nicest pub in Shiz. To Galinda, calling it a dive was an understatement with its weak, flickering electric lamps, musty odour and the grizzled old patrons that never seemed to leave. But it was close to campus, it was cheap, and they were such regulars that no one gave one jot of a group made up of Crope and Tibbett, a munchkin, three society girls, a winkie and, well, Elphaba.</p>
<p>That didn’t mean she was comfortable there. Even less than usual considering how the stakes had changed with the public announcement of her relationship with Elphaba, and she couldn’t help glancing her head through the corners of the room like she expected to be jumped at any moment. She half expected to be jumped at any moment. Elphaba squeezed her hand.</p>
<p>“Relax, Galinda. This isn’t any different to a normal Friday night. Drink your fill, flirt and get handsy, and I’ll carry you home in a few hours. Same as usual.”</p>
<p>“Easy for you to say. You’ve just got to say nice things about me, and stop Avaric from punching Crope or Tibbett in the face. Both come naturally to you.” She hoped her smile came off as playful; from the way Elphaba’s cheeks darkened it had done. “Be a darling and get me a drink? I’m going to find a table.” Elphaba nodded sharply, and beelined for the bar.</p>
<p>Galinda took the opportunity to properly size up the room, before settling in a corner next to the door. They could make an easy exit if they so choose, and would have slightly more time to prepare themselves for anyone who should walk through. That was why she’d made Elphaba come early, after all, so that they wouldn’t be at a disadvantage in joining a conversation half way through, and would be privy to any gossip and jokes that were formed at the start of the night. It also reduced the likelihood of the pair of them being at the butt of those jokes.</p>
<p>As she made herself comfortable in the booth, she wondered if she’d ever be free of high society’s rules and regulations.</p>
<p>Elphaba was still at the bar when the pair walked in, glanced around the room for a moment, laid eyes on her and approached. She ignored her sweating palms. It would be fine. Elphaba was right, this was no different to their regular Friday night. Nothing had changed just because everything had.</p>
<p>She wished Elphaba would return soon though. Galinda wasn’t nearly drunk enough to handle inane small talk, and she’d exhausted her patience the day before. Pfannee hated her Literature professor, Shenshen hated all her professors except an attractive aid in A History of Gillikin Art. Galinda said little, but shifted and straightened in her seat when she saw Elphaba finally turn away from the bar. If her friends noticed the way her smile softened, they didn’t comment on it.</p>
<p>“Elphie!” She exclaimed, shuffling along the bench to make room for the brunette. “I was beginning to think you’d been kidnapped, I was already planning the search party.”</p>
<p>“Not with yourself at the head, surely?” Elphaba replied, her face expressionless save for the single, perpetually raised eyebrow, but Galinda could hear the laughter in her voice. Galinda knew what to look for. “I’m not sure any would-be kidnapper stands a chance against your particular brand of fury.” She laughed, then turned towards the pair opposite them, and the laughter stuck to the back of her throat. She sipped her cider - Munchkinland in origin, and far sweeter than any Gillikin brand - and couldn’t quite meet Shenshen’s hard gaze. Elphaba followed her eyes to the other girls.</p>
<p>“Ah, of course. My apologies, Miss Pfannee, Miss Shenshen. How are you both?” Galinda couldn’t believe her ears. Not only was Elphaba going to exchange civil pleasantries with two girls she openly tolerated at best, but she was going to make her sit through the same boring conversation twice? And she’d thought they were friends.</p>
<p>But Shenshen, it seemed, wasn’t interested in making small talk with Elphaba.</p>
<p>“Miss Elphaba! It’s so delightful to have you for one of these little ladies’ get togethers. Why, I feel as though I hardly know you, and yet you’ve swept Galinda right off her feet.” Elphaba’s cheeks darkened. She shot a soft glance towards Galinda, who took her hand underneath with a grin she didn’t feel. Neither of them had been prepared for a night of just Pfannee and Shenshen - even when Galinda hadn’t realised that friendship could be so much more than what they offered, she avoided those where she could. Elphaba squeezed her hand, and Galinda’s spine relaxed slightly.</p>
<p>“Yes, well. I rather think she swept me off mine. She is a force to be reckoned with, don’t you think?”</p>
<p>“Quite.” Shenshen replied shortly, before standing. “Right, I’m going to get a drink so we can get this night started properly. Care for anything, Pfannee?” She left them with Pfannee’s drink order. Galinda thought that was almost sweet of Shenshen, who would usually spend the whole evening trying to collect as many free drinks from their friends and bar patrons alike. Until Pfannee took it upon herself to begin the inquisition anew.</p>
<p>“So how did the pair of you fall into this...relationship?” Galinda wasn’t sure why her stomach twisted with nerves at the question. They’d workshopped this at the beginning of the week, while they were...practicing...the rest of their lie. She knew, word for word, what she was supposed to say.</p>
<p>“It all happened over the summer. We wrote near daily, teasing and circling around this very obvious thing between us. And Elphie, who as you know doesn’t really like playing games like you or I might, just came right out and asked me if I, quote, “am romantically interested in” her. I didn’t reply for three days, and she wrote again to apologise. My own letter of confession and apology crossed hers in the mail. And, well.” She nodded to their linked hands. “The rest just fell into place.” It was almost the truth: she had spent most of the summer flirting with Elphaba, albeit without recognising the playful banter for what it was. She’d spent long, lonely nights agonising over what her friend’s letters meant, over what her own said about her. Not all of the summer had been relaxing. But they didn’t need to know all of that, and more importantly, Elphaba didn’t need to know.</p>
<p>“I must admit, I didn’t see you turning out like this.” Pfannee said. Galinda’s stomach plummetted. She really didn’t want to deal with that now, of all times; her little outburst yesterday was supposed to dissuade both girls from any open homophobia - she’d set the expected bar for their behaviour fairly low, she felt.</p>
<p>“Turning out like what?” Elphaba asked for her, her voice hard. Pfannee must have seen the same edge Galinda did, because she began to backtrack.</p>
<p>“Oh, no I didn’t mean anything like that! Well, it was a surprise, Galinda, when you told us yesterday how you were, you know,” She mouthed the word ‘gay’ like the act of saying it aloud would cause a riot. Galinda wanted to laugh. Or cry. Or stand up for herself, and insist that she</p>
<p>was exactly the same person she was before the summer, with less chance of attracting a man that Pfannee herself might be interested in, and so really her coming out should have set the other girls at ease. Instead she squeezed Elphaba’s hand tighter. “But we’ve both,” her head turned to the bar, where Shenshen was still waiting for service. “Seen how you changed over last year, and I for one think it’s a good thing. You clearly weren’t supposed to settle down and marry a rich, overly affectionate husband like the rest of us. You could do anything you wanted.”</p>
<p>Galinda was sure that was supposed to be a compliment. Pfannee sounded so awed, like Galinda had found a freedom in homosexuality, while the rest of them were cursed in the miserable comfort and easy lives that would come to them almost straight out of university. She sounded almost like she admired Galinda for it.</p>
<p>But all she saw, a reel of film playing out before her, was her father’s disappointment, her mother’s shame and distress. Ostracization from the friends and family and life she’d been planning for since her childhood. Raising sons to be powerful politicians and daughters to be beautiful socialites, attending parties with her faceless husband, the perfect reward for his success and influence. It sickened her to know that she was still the same girl who wanted that peace and security and mediocre elitism, but the full force of everything she was giving up by living her truth - even through a lie - was staggering. She felt a tightening on her hand, and forced her eyes to focus on Elphaba’s sharp green face. Her heartrate and breathing slowed at the depth of warmth in brown eyes. Now wasn’t the time for doubts. She just had to get through this one night.</p>
<p>“Galinda has always been able to do anything.” She said, her voice fierce with something Galinda couldn’t name. “She didn’t need me for that.”</p>
<p>“I think we all know that’s not true, though.” Shenshen had returned, two pints of something dark red in hand, and four tiny glasses of a deep amber liquid. “You may have been...different...all along, Galinda, but without Miss Elphaba’s encouragement, you would have settled into the perfect life laid out for you, exactly the same as the rest of us. She forced herself to smile, a gentle inclincation of her head the only agreement she could offer in response. “It’s very lucky that you found Miss Elphaba then, so that you can, indeed, do anything.”</p>
<p>“Yes.” Galinda replied, the effort of biting her tongue any longer too great. “I dare say I am very lucky.” But meeting those cold green eyes across the table, she didn’t feel very lucky at all. She felt like the ground was giving way underneath her. Pfannee was harmless, if left to her own devices. But Shenshen could be down right malicious when she wanted to be. She didn’t know what the woman could do to her, or why she’d bother doing anything when Galinda had so very clearly orchestrated her own demise, but the prickling sensation at the back of her neck told her to be careful.</p>
<p>Shenshen put one small, thimble sized glass before each of them.</p>
<p>“A toast. In celebration of new friendships, and new beginnings.” She held up her glass, and the four shared the toast. Galinda swallowed the rum before it had a chance to burn her throat. She was no stranger to hard liquor, but it never settled pleasantly in the pit of her stomach with the weight of a sweet cider. But it had the desired effect; her whole body warmed with the alcohol, and she focused more on Elphaba’s hand in hers than whispered doubts and inconcrete fears.</p>
<p>“Where did you spend your summer, Elphaba?” Pfannee asked. Elphaba looked more than a little uncomfortable at the personal question, but Galinda was curious to see how much she’d share with the two almost strangers, so she didn’t jump in to help her out. “Oh. At my family’s estate, Colwen Grounds. It’s in Nest Hardings, in the far east of Munchkinland.”</p>
<p>“Right, because you’re a Thropp, aren’t you. Basically Munchkinland royalty.” Elphaba’s eyes narrowed at Shenshen.</p>
<p>“You’ve never been to Munchkinland, have you? Don’t say that kind of thing there.”</p>
<p>“Why not?” Shenshen, despite herself, looked interested. It was most likely at the prospect of learning new details about Elphaba to fuel gossip and rumour, than any actual desire to get to know her better. Still, Galinda kept her mouth shut. If Elphaba wanted to tell all, let her tell all. She wasn’t actually the green girl’s keeper.</p>
<p>“It’s not seen as a good thing. A lot of people advocating for change.” She seemed reluctant to share more, for which Galinda was eternally thankful, and she changed the topic easily.</p>
<p>“What about you, Shenshen? Did you go out to your Uncle’s vineyard as planned?” Galinda suspected the blonde saw right through her diversion, but she seemed keen enough to keep talking about her summer on what was essentially a farm that Galinda didn’t care. Besides, Elphaba was genuinely interested in the workings of a Gillikin farm, and how it differed from Munchkinland.</p>
<p>“Why don’t you ask Galinda?” Came Shenshen’s sharp tongue when she asked one too many questions. Galinda flushed under Elphaba’s surprised gaze. “Her father owns a farm.”</p>
<p>“Yes, well I never got out there much. My mother was always so busy with parties and luncheons, and I usually went with her.” She failed to mention that she hated every moment of those gatherings, and loved being out on the farm, with its streams and woodland and old, rundown farmhouse that only the farmhands lived in any more.</p>
<p>“Besides, he doesn’t really run the farm. He just owns it, right?” Pfannee added. Galinda nodded like that made everything okay, like she couldn’t feel Elphaba’s eyes burning into the side of her head any more than Shenshen’s burned from in front of her.</p>
<p>“He only gets out there once or twice a year, when he has to.” Elphaba’s hand relaxed in her grip, so that Galinda was left holding her hand, rather than an equal exchange in pressure. She left her eyes on her roommate, but she did not look back.</p>
<p>“Well, I’m truly sorry for the sudden interruption, girls. I’ve just remembered an appointment I had elsewhere in a few moments. I should be heading off.” So saying, Elphaba swallowed the rest of her cider, stood swiftly and shrugged on her coat.</p>
<p>“Oh, of course! So sorry Elphie, I was supposed to remind you.” Galinda said quickly, pushing aside the ice that ran down her spine. Elphaba looked at her for a moment, face unreadable. Then:</p>
<p>“It’s not a problem, my sweet. I’ll see you later.” She leaned down and placed a rough kiss to Galinda’s cheek before striding out of the pub. Galinda felt sick. She knew Elphaba hated unnecessary small talk (a trait Galinda had picked up from her) but it was unlike Elphaba to be quite so brusque. Or, no. No, it was exactly like early Elphaba, pre-friendship Elphaba. Had she gone too far, said too much? She should have stepped in when they were asking her too many questions. She knew Elphaba hated talking about herself. She should have known better.</p>
<p>“Well, that was rude.” Shenshen said, watching Galinda carefully. She quickly schooled her features into careless neutrality.</p>
<p>“Oh yes, well. You know what she’s like. She’s supposed to be meeting with one of her professors - of biology, I think - something about summer credit.” It wasn’t entirely a lie, but Galinda was starting to feel uneasy. How many lies could she get away with telling before something knotted in the web.</p>
<p>She forced herself to spend the remainder of the evening playing the role for which she was raised, but she couldn’t shake her anxiety. Nor could she stop herself from glancing over her companion's shoulders, towards the door every few minutes, though she avoided Shenshen's shrewd gaze when she did so.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Past the End of her Nose</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Galinda, apparently, can look past anything Elphaba does. Whether it's out of love or loneliness, I don't think even she knows.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Elphaba was angry with her.</p>
<p>The change was subtle, but she noticed it. She’d been hyper-aware of everything Elphaba said or did since the beginning of their friendship; she knew her roommate too well not to notice the differences. They ate together, sat together, studied together amongst the browning trees of the University grounds. They talked as usual, their teasing back and forth banter indistinguishable from any other day. To the rest of their friends.</p>
<p>Galinda, however, knew what awaited her when they got back to their room. Elphaba would change into her coat and immediately leave for the library, or settle down at the desk without a word, pulling out a textbook for a subject Galinda didn’t even know was something that could be studied, or else she’d just roll into bed, facing away from Galinda, and the blonde would be forced to settle in for the night as well.</p>
<p>She wasn’t stupid: if this ridiculous act of theirs was difficult for her, Lurline only knew how hard it must have been for Elphaba. The other girl actually had to pretend to be gay, to be in love with her, to enjoy the hand holding and kissing and easy affection that Galinda had sunk herself into giving all too easily. Two of those things wouldn’t have come naturally to the prickly woman; she wasn’t too self-absorbed to think that Elphaba would have minded pretending to be interested in other women. Or maybe it was so easy for other people to believe of her that she didn’t have to try at all.</p>
<p>If the strain of pretending to date Galinda was getting to be too much for her, they should end it. Right? Let her parents know the engagement had ended, that she didn’t want to talk about it, that she’d prefer to remain under the radar as much as possible and sink into comfortable obscurity until her dying day.</p>
<p>Comfortable obscurity? It surprised her that she was serious. She’d rather disappear from society entirely - which absolutely would be the case if an engagement fell apart, she’d seen it happen before - than risk losing Elphaba’s friendship. Had that change happened over the last week? No, she didn’t think it had. Somewhere between barrelling her way into her bedroom without so much as an apologetic glance, to agreeing to put her life on hold to pretend to date Galinda, Elphaba had fundamentally changed the ways Galind thought, felt and behaved. She’d become the most important influence in the blonde’s life.</p>
<p>And that was ignoring, for the moment, how her own more intimate feelings felt towards her<br/>roommate.</p>
<p>She’d talk to Elphaba, she decided. If this really was putting too much strain on their friendship, she’d end the charade.</p>
<p>As it happened, Elphaba wasn’t too difficult to find - once Galinda understood how the library was laid out. It was the first time she’d been inside the building, after over a year of study, and she had to ask at the main desk for help in locating Elphaba.</p>
<p>She was in the biology section, which was not only predictable, but almost disappointingly so. Galinda watched for a moment, admiring the dark hair cascading over thin shoulders, and the scrawled, loopy handwriting that Galinda had had to learn how to read when her roommate started sharing her notes. Between the overly affectionate, sickly sweet Elphaba she got in public, and the cool, detached Elphaba she’d known in private over the weekend, she’d missed an Elphaba she could recognise. Passionate about a research project that would almost certainly be set aside once it was finished, only to be replaced with the next subject of interest, was the Elphaba she’d forged a hesitant friendship with over slow conversation late into nights, and spent all summer writing to and thinking about constantly. It was the Elphaba she knew.</p>
<p>“Hi.” She said quietly. Elphaba looked up, startled and then expressionless as she took in Galinda. “Can we talk?”</p>
<p>“Does it have to be now? I’m in the middle of -”</p>
<p>“You’re always in the middle of something.” Galinda pointed out, though her voice was still soft. She was hesitant to scare her friend off. “I promise, once we’re done I’ll leave you to whatever it is that you’re working on this week.” Green hands hesitated, then began pulling books and papers off the opposite side of the table. Galinda sat down. She prayed Elphaba didn’t notice her trembling hands.</p>
<p>“You’ve been avoiding me.” She began. Tone light, words calm, no accusations here. She could do this with the same emotional detachment Elphaba could do everything.</p>
<p>“I have.” Elphaba inclined her head. Galinda hadn’t expected her roommate to lie - it wasn’t in her nature - but the simplicity of the admission floored her. She swallowed around her tongue to continue.</p>
<p>“Why?” Elphaba didn’t reply. “Has it gotten too much?” She asked, desperately, hating the fear in her voice but unable to stifle it. “If you didn’t want to do this anymore I’d - I’d understand.”</p>
<p>“What? Glin, what on earth are you talking about?”</p>
<p>“Our...” She glanced around the small, enclosed alcove of books Elphaba had hidden away in, ensuring that they were still completely alone. “Our arrangement.” She finished with a hiss. “If you can’t do it anymore, I’d understand. I just...I miss you.” She sounded small, childlike, and too, too needy, and she knew it. “What happened?”</p>
<p>“You think this is because I don’t want to do this anymore?” Galinda had expected relief, or perhaps reluctant acceptance that hid joy. Certainly not confusion. “What on Earth gave you that idea?”</p>
<p>“That you haven’t exactly been available over the last few days. Since...since Friday night, when I came home to find you still obviously awake, but pretending to be out cold so you didn’t have to talk to me.” She refused to hide the hurt and in fact crossed her arms across her chest to emphasize the point. She’d felt so alone that night, isolated from the two girls who she’d once thought of as friends, only to come home and find the only person she truly considered a friend stubbornly pretending she didn’t exist. She’d feigned sleep to mask her tears, because she didn’t want to learn that perhaps Elphaba truly didn’t care about her at all.</p>
<p>Most of her reaction had been the alcohol, she knew, but the underlying loneliness had been real.</p>
<p>“Galinda, I -” But Elphaba couldn’t finish the sentence. She felt the tears, all too familiar in the last couple of days, burning at the corners of her eyes, and did nothing to hide them.</p>
<p>“Are you tired of me?” Elphaba shook her head quickly. “Are you tired of lying for me?” Again she shook her head.</p>
<p>“Never, Glin. Whatever you need.” But that couldn’t have been true, because when she’d needed her Elphaba, there had been no one there.</p>
<p>“Have I done something wrong?” Elphaba flinched. A lump formed in the back of Galinda’s throat. “Elphie? What is it?”</p>
<p>“It’s not you, Glin.” She started, leaning forwards slightly in her seat. “You’ve done nothing wrong, I promise.”</p>
<p>“Then what is it?”</p>
<p>“On Friday. You were talking about your family...your father owns a farm.” Galinda frowned.</p>
<p>“So?”</p>
<p>“And doesn’t work it himself.” Something clicked in the back of her head, though the connection was hazy. Munchkinland. Drought. Farmland. The bell in her mind finally rang, and she exhaled slowly as the realization washed over her.</p>
<p>“We have that luxury.” She said slowly. Elphaba breathed a sigh, like perhaps she’d hoped Galinda would pick up on the problem. “Munchkin farmers couldn’t own their own farms, and we own land that other people work, and that’s wrong.” Elphaba nodded.</p>
<p>“It was something of a reality check for me, the reminder that you are, actually, something of the rich, airheaded socialite you pretend to be.” She said, but she was smiling, and that took any bite out of what she said. “There’s a reason the Emminency isn’t a popular line in Munchkinland.” Galinda finally smiled, and let her shoulders relax down her back.</p>
<p>“There were a couple of points that you just made that I’d like to circle back to, but I want to make sure we’re on the same page.” Elphaba gestured silently with a hand for Galinda to continue. “You had managed to forget that I come from a line of nobility and wealth, and being reminded of that made you feel so conflicted about our friendship that you were going to ignore me in private?” She took great delight in the purple blush forming along Elphaba’s high cheekbones,  in the downcast brown eyes.</p>
<p>“Yes?” She said, a question more than a statement. Then she sighed. “No, not really. You’re my friend, Galinda, and you deserved better. I just wanted to get my head on a little bit straighter.”</p>
<p>“For what it’s worth, I’m not sure I like the practice any more than you do.” She noted the way Elphaba’s eyes lit up with pleasure; she loved surprising her roommate. “But that’s neither here nor there. Because I <em>was</em> raised a rich, airheaded socialite, and I <em>am</em> still sorting through a range of bias that comes with such a position of privilege. But I <em>will</em> get there, Miss Third Thropp Descending.” Elphaba winced at the title, and Galinda bit back a laugh. “In the meantime, though, please just talk to me. I don’t exactly have many friends at the moment, in case you hadn’t noticed,” She glanced around the dusty shelves of the library with an over-exaggerated look of disgust that made Elphaba cackle. “And I did miss you.” Elphaba’s expression softened considerably.</p>
<p>“I missed you too, dear. Lack of class understanding and all.” Galinda arched an eyebrow at her, and Elphaba laughed. “Alright, fine. I promise to get better at communicating when I have a problem with something you can’t help.”</p>
<p>“Wonderful,” Galinda said, grinning. “Now, can we please leave? This building is so dusty, I feel sure it’s haunted.” Elphaba rolled her eyes, but began packing up books and papers anyway.</p>
<p>“Oh, it is. They say an old married couple live in the biology department, and spend all days fighting about petty misunderstandings.” She whacked Elphaba on the arm, but couldn’t quite ignore the loaded statement. She’d compared them to a married couple. That had to mean something, unless it was a play on their own petty bickering, or on the scenario that Galinda had put them in. Elphaba was going to be the death of her, she decided, following the taller girl back out into the sunshine.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Pretty</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It  wasn't that Elphaba could just be pretty if she tried a little more. It was that Elphaba was already gorgeous, even if Galinda was the only person who could see it.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Sometimes I wish you’d let more people see you the way I do.”</p>
<p>Galinda hadn’t meant to say anything. She was busy, they were both busy working, and she’d been really good at concentrating on the horrible history papers that seemed to get more frequent and more complicated every week, and she looked up for a half second to refocus her eyes to one of her favourite visions. Elphaba, one hand reaching idly for the elastic at the base of her long braid, and untangling the tightly wound locks loop by loop.</p>
<p>She shook her hair out, silky strands cascading down her back carelessly, and as she reached again to retie the hair Galinda had spoken impulsively. Elphaba looked at her, frown already in place.</p>
<p>“Whatever do you mean?” Galinda blushed - she’d blushed more in the last two weeks than the rest of her life, she was sure - but couldn’t take back what she’d said.</p>
<p>“With - with your hair down, I mean. It’s very pretty.” All she got in response was a half shrug, as Elphaba had already turned back to her books. “Not that you would know pretty if it hit you in the face.” It sounded meaner than it did in her head, and she regretted it the instance it was in the air, but Elphaba only laughed, and looked at her again.</p>
<p>“I know that you’re pretty.” Galinda rolled her eyes, though her blush darkened.</p>
<p>“Well that would just be impossible to miss.” She felt a little off balance and wanted to get back on track. “You really are though Elphie.”</p>
<p>“What? Impossible to miss?” Galinda giggled.</p>
<p>“Pretty.” She frowned at Elphaba’s harsh cackle. “I mean it! There’s a certain...sharpness to your features that might not charm most people, but with your hair down you look quite lovely.” Not to mention the delightful purple that spread across her cheeks at the compliment. It really was the same colour as her lips, the more she thought on it, and had the same kind of softness about them that she still wasn’t used to when they kissed. She forced her eyes back to Elphaba’s, aware of the dangerous path her thoughts took when she dwelled too long on their kisses, and found a softness to the brown that she didn’t often see. She melted a little.</p>
<p>“Well,” Elphaba replied, her voice quiet. She dropped her gaze from Galinda’s. “I suppose you are something of an expert on pretty women.”</p>
<p>“Elphie!” She exclaimed, though more for the act of scandal than any actual shame. She didn’t mind when Elphie made half-assed jokes or sarcastic comments about her sexuality. She’d abandoned Crope and Tibbett at a lunch not two days earlier for the same offence. She smiled, and then laughed. “Though I do believe you’re right. And I, in my expert opinion, declare you to be one of the prettiest.” Her heart pounded in her chest at the admission. It might have been too far, she knew, too close to the truth to be ignored.</p>
<p>“I’m not sure your friends would be happy with that declaration.”</p>
<p>“Oh please.” She scoffed, flicking imaginary dust off her shoulder. “Those two can’t even manage to look ladylike most of the time, let alone be pretty. Besides, they can’t be angry if I complement you over them - we’re courting, remember?”</p>
<p>“Oh yes, how could I forget?” Galinda wished she was more comfortable discussing their ruse, even that she could joke more about it. Or she wished she’d not mentioned it at all: she was enjoying herself, and now she could only think about the ridiculous lie hanging over their heads.</p>
<p>“Still, I’m not sure they’d take kindly to the comparison, regardless of your affections for me.” Elphaba grinned, the amusement in her eyes sparkling. Galinda wanted to scream. It wasn’t fair that the green girl felt so comfortable in their game that she could joke about it, while Galinda fought a very real urge to kiss her senseless.</p>
<p>But this was her fault. And a better option than honestly. And she did still get to kiss Elphaba, regularly and publicly, claiming her with bright pink or red lipstick, almost whenever she wanted.</p>
<p>Except when it mattered.</p>
<p>Like right now. She wanted to tangle her fingers in the loose waterfall of black hair, straddle thin legs and kiss Elphaba until she forgot her own name, and could feel nothing but strong fingers clutched desperately at her back and a deep ache in her -</p>
<p>She closed her book suddenly. The sharp snap made Elphaba look back up from her books.</p>
<p>“Everything okay?”</p>
<p>“I can’t concentrate anymore. You mean green thing, you’ve distracted me with all of your charming conversation!”</p>
<p>“My dear, I thought we agreed. I’m not charming.” Galinda rolled her eyes when Elphaba cackled.</p>
<p>“Honestly Elphie, now isn’t the time to throw my own horrible words back at me. You’ve bewitched me from my studies, and now I demand that we go for a walk instead.” Galinda caught the amused headshake Elphaba shot her way, and thought she saw a fond smile to pair with it, though that could have been wishful thinking on her part. She shrugged on a shawl, Elphaba tugged on her boots, and they left. Galinda couldn’t keep the grin off her face every time she glanced up to her companion.</p>
<p>Elphaba hadn’t tied her hair up.</p>
<p>It couldn’t have been an accident: the afternoon was breezy, and it kept whipping around the tall girl wildly, sometimes at a perfect right angle behind her, despite its length and weight. For the first time, Galinda could see how apt Elphie’s name truly was; she could picture her roommate hidden behind a waterfall in a mountain, truly bewitching nations and saving the disenfranchised, free from the mediocrity of the rest of them. She was a force of nature, Galinda realised in that moment.</p>
<p>“I should have tied this up.” Elphaba complained, taking her right hand back for a moment to twist her hair into something resembling tidy.</p>
<p>“I’m glad you didn’t.” Galinda said, taking her hand back. “It suits you.”</p>
<p>“But isn’t it...unseemly?” She asked, oddly hesitant. Galinda laughed at her nerves - when did Elphaba ever get nervous?</p>
<p>“Well, I suppose it’s not proper for a young lady to bandy about with such long hair loose and untamed.”</p>
<p>“Well then, why would-”</p>
<p>“But,” Galinda went on, talking directly over Elphaba with a sigh to emphasize her irritation at the interruption. Elphaba rolled her eyes. “When have you ever been a proper young lady?” Elphaba had to laugh at that, and squeezed Galinda’s hand.</p>
<p>“You do have a point there.”</p>
<p>“And loose and untamed describes you rather well, I find.” She finished with a fond smile. Elphaba's shoulders shifted; Galinda’s heart bloomed. She was shy, she realised. She’d known the girl didn’t appreciate compliments, but that wasn’t going to stop her showing the adoration Elphaba deserved. Still, perhaps she should back off just a little, return the pair of them to familiar ground. “Something of a calamity, really.” She added, nudging Elphie with her elbow playfully. Elphaba rolled her eyes.</p>
<p>“Yes, well. Tell me something I don’t already know.”</p>
<p>“Okay. Some people like a little bit of disaster now and again.” She laughed at the expression on her roommate’s face. “Helps keep life interesting.” She pulled a laughing Elphaba faster down the path, towards the trees and canal, the autumn breeze training Elphaba’s hair out behind them like a train. Galinda felt almost giddy. This was so much better than a stuffy bedroom with books all over the desk and her own libido driving her wild.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. From Colwen Grounds</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Shell writes from Colwen Grounds, and the pair have a little bit of a falling out.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey all! Another chapter that was a real pain in the ass to write. I hope y'all like it more than I do!</p>
<p>Also, I remembered a couple of days ago that I just...completely forgot about Boq as a character that exists in this universe, so...apologies to anyone whose a big fan of him, but he won't be appearing in this fic at all.</p>
<p>I mean, he could...but I refuse to make him an antagonist because I'm bookverse-centric and he's nothing but sweet there.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“He knows.”</p>
<p>She looked up from her textbook; Elphab a’s chest was heaving, and she clutched a piece of paper in her shaking hand. She thrust the paper onto the desk in front of Galinda.</p>
<p>“Whoa, Elphie, breathe. Who knows what?” She glanced over the letter, saw the words <em>Father</em> and <em>serious matter.</em> Her blood ran cold. It was too soon, she wanted to scream. They weren't ready to pretend for families yet!</p>
<p>“Father. That’s from my brother.” Her eyes widened at the revelation that Elphaba had a brother - her roommate wasn’t exactly forthcoming with details of her home life - and concentrated on the messy, lazy scrawl that mirrored his sister’s.</p>
<p>“You have a brother?” She couldn’t help but ask, as her eyes worked out where one letter ended and another began. She began to suspect that the entire Thropp family needed handwriting lessons.</p>
<p>“I’m the oldest of three.” Galinda glanced back to the tense woman, but she read Galinda’s mind. “You never asked.” She added simply. Galinda’s face warmed - what a basic conversational point to forget - and focused back on the letter.</p>
<p>“<em>Fabala, you are to...home immediately. Father thinks that...manipulating you towards.</em>.. I’m<br/>sorry, Elphie, I can’t read this.”</p>
<p>“Shell wants me to go home - Frex wants to exorcise the demon that has, apparently, given me these unnatural desires.” She rolled her eyes, but there was a hardness behind them that Galinda wasn’t used to. This was properly shaking her roommate, there had to be something she could do. “He thinks I’ve been possessed, that you’ve bewitched me in some way.” A quip about sorcery came to the tip of her tongue, but Elphaba looked so unlike herself that Galinda swallowed it back down.</p>
<p>“Elphie,” She said quietly, placing a hand on a trembling forearm. “We can come clean, it’s okay. I don’t want to get between you and your family.” Elphaba laughed, a harsh bark that bit through Galinda.</p>
<p>“I appreciate the thought, my dear. Unfortunately, that ship sailed years ago. I really couldn’t care less what he thinks of me.” She was confident that Elphaba was lying; despite everything she said, she knew her roommate did care about the poisoned words and looks that were thrown her way regularly. Perhaps she was so good at lying that she’d managed to convince herself, and that would make it an unkindness for Galinda to shatter the illusion. So she didn’t.</p>
<p>“Then what’s the matter?” Elphaba’s eyes shut, face screwed up. Galinda’s mind reeled; she’d never seen Elphaba quite so upset before. She’d seemed unshakeable. “Elphie, please. Talk to me. Let me help you.” When she spoke, her eyes were still tightly closed.</p>
<p>“He wants you to come with me. He thinks he can save you.” Oh. Oh no.</p>
<p>“He wants to...” Surely not? She could expect that from her own parents - it was one of the main attractions to Elphaba playing at courtship with her, to have a strong, stable friend with her during her coming out - but not from a man she’d never met before.</p>
<p>“Yes. It’s awful, and I’m so so sorry that I’m related to that kind of person.” It didn’t actually sting her quite like she expected, the idea of a religious exorcism. Not that she believed it worked - she’d surely know if she was possessed by some kind of spirit - and Frexspar was hardly going to do anything truly drastic. The only force that might be powerful enough to bend her inclinations had to be sorcery, and she knew enough about the Unnamed God and its faith to know that would never be an option. No, this religious prejudice she could almost understand - a man who had given himself over entirely to the Unnamed God was hardly going to let a little something like his daughter’s happiness change that.</p>
<p>What did sting was Elphaba thinking she could be anything like that kind of person. She knew her Elphie. She cared about people first, before any sense of morality or obligation or ideology. Wasn’t her own foolish mistake, and Elphaba’s resulting kindness living proof of that?</p>
<p>“When does he want us to go? He must understand that you have studies to finish.” Elphaba blinked at her, jaw slack. “You can’t expect me to let you face him alone? This is, quite literally, all my fault. The least you can let me do is accept some kind of responsibility.” There was no way Elphaba could deal with that alone. And, if she could convine Frex that actually people like her were fairly normal - the way Elphaba had made her feel since her own stuttering confession - then at least one or two Munchkins would have an easier experience than she got.</p>
<p>“It’s not your fault.” Elphaba said stiffly. “He should have believed me the first time around.”</p>
<p>“What do you mean?” Galinda frowned, confused. Elphaba shrugged.</p>
<p>“I told him of my own inclinations before leaving for Shiz. He didn’t believe me - apparently I just like to shock and horrify him.”</p>
<p>“Hold on!” Galinda exclaimed, her brain having finally caught up with her ears. “You’re not also...”</p>
<p>“Gay? Not exactly. Its complicated when you didn’t expect to be the subject of affection - even when it’s all make believe.” She half smiled for the first time since entering the room. “I alluded to the possibility that I might court or be courted by another woman during an argument. He didn’t take me seriously.”</p>
<p>“Why didn’t you say anything?” She could barely hold a lid on her temper; Elphaba had let her go through the last month believing she was the only one like her at the university. How on earth could she? “Why did you let me think for so long that this was only my burden to bear?” She didn’t realise her voice had raised until Elphaba replied.</p>
<p>“Because!” Elphaba replied, her voice far, far louder than she was expecting. Galinda recoiled slightly. “I figured you’d have picked up on the subtle hint of me suggesting we <em>get married</em>. The rest of Shiz picked up on the message, and I know for a fact you’re more clever than most of them. I didn’t think I needed to say anything.”</p>
<p>“Well they don’t know that this whole set up is completely made up until I can get my parents off my back!” Her stomach turned to stone the second the words were out of her mouth; Elphaba’s face tightened, and she tore her eyes away before she could see that coldness in them that she hated. “I just meant -”</p>
<p>“You made it quite clear what you meant.” Elphaba snapped back. “I’ll be in the library. See you for breakfast tomorrow.” Elphaba left quickly, snatching back the letter as she turned.</p>
<p>Galinda let her head fall to the table, roughly sliding the textbook out of the way so her tears<br/>wouldn’t stain the expensive pages. Elphaba had come out to her, albeit offhandedly, and Galinda had reminded her in no uncertain terms that her first relationship was a lie. Of <em>course</em> she was going to be upset. She wouldn't blame Elphaba if she never spoke to her again.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Epiphany</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Galinda realises several things over the course of one day. None of the realisations are particularly pleasant.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Gosh, I'm sorry! It has been a while, hasn't it? This was another tricky one to write, but I quite like how it turned out, even if things are a little rough for our favourite blonde at the moment.</p>
<p>This chapter was written whilst listening to Mitski's Francis Forever on repeat so...now you know why it's Like That. Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Silence sat heavily over the pair of them. It had done from when Elphaba had returned, later into the night than Galinda had any business seeing, but she couldn’t have slept if she’d wanted to. This was starting to feel uncomfortably familiar. Her tongue was too thick to properly form the right words to apologise, and so she let the weight of regret silence her instead.</p>
<p>She wasn’t even sure she wanted to talk to Elphaba again; Galinda was still more than a little furious. She knew she was overreacting, she knew that she was in the wrong and that she had royally screwed up. But that didn’t change that Elphaba should have told her! How could her roommate let her spill her heart and soul all those weeks ago, and not take the opportunity to open up to her? Did Elphaba not trust her? Maybe she just didn’t care for Galinda as much as she did Elphaba. She thought she was used to that idea by now, but it plagued her constantly, and she was miserable.</p>
<p>Not that Elphaba appeared to notice. She went about her days in exactly the same way as previously; the only exception was that she was no longer talking to Galinda.</p>
<p>“The problem is, I don’t even know why she’s upset!” She moaned to a Fiyero who barely looked up from his own dusty textbook. “I mean, I know why, obviously. I said something really rather mean, and it naturally hurt her feelings. But I don’t know <em>why</em> it hurt her feelings! If I knew that, I could apologise properly!”</p>
<p>“Well, what did you say?” At his question, she paused. She should have just kept her mouth shut, suffered in silence, and let her friends think what they wanted about the imminent demise of their relationship. She’d never learned to hold her tongue.</p>
<p>“Oh, that’s not really...I mean...that’s sort of private.” And another lie. She was going to have to make a list at some point, lest she lose track of all the individual lies she’d already told a month into the semester. But better a lie than to admit she’d been horrible to Elphaba during her coming out. Because that’s what really happened, wasn’t it? Elphaba had shared so much that evening, and all she’d done was lash out. <em>Fuck</em>. Fiyero let out a bark of laughter.</p>
<p>“Right, okay. None of my business, got it.” He turned back to his book, and Galinda thought she’d lost him before she had the chance to get her newfound guilt out. Then, he added. “If you knew it was going to upset her, why did you say it?” She leaned back in her chair, regret and remorse churning in her stomach like they were still fresh.</p>
<p>“It just...slipped out, I guess.” She took a second to breathe, let out a deep sigh, and with it came her confession “No. That’s not true. She’d said something that caught me off guard, and I let my temper get the better of me. I think I was looking for some kind of reaction from her. She’s always so calm and untouched by everything and I needed to see that something could get to her.” She needed to see that Elphaba cared about her.</p>
<p>“No one’s untouchable.” Fiyero said. But<em> she</em> was. Elphaba was unaffected, always, had been since their first weeks together. And if Elphaba shared her interests, and was still unaffected by her, where did that leave her?</p>
<p>Elphaba really wasn’t interested in her at all. It was that, more than anything, that had caused her to lash out, and ultimately cost her that friendship. But that wasn’t Elphaba’s fault. Hot tears stung her eyes, and she let them fall but kept her eyes on her textbook so Fiyero couldn’t see. It wasn’t her fault she’d fallen for Elphaba! If she could have chosen literally anyone else at Shiz, she probably would have done - initially, at least. But it wasn’t Elphaba’s fault either. Galinda owed her so much already, but the least she could do was an apology.</p>
<p>“I know.” She muttered. “I just don’t know how to fix this.” Maybe she couldn’t. Maybe this was how she finally lost Elphaba, in one moment of hot-headed anger. Months of being an intentional bitch couldn’t do what her emotional instability could do in five minutes. But the least she could do was try to make amends. If Elphaba didn’t want to accept her apology, that was her right.</p>
<p>“I don’t know what to say that will help.” Fiyero said, finally looking up towards her. “But if anyone can figure it out, it’ll be you. You’re like...two peas in a pod, I think. You’re really very similar.” Except that couldn’t be true, because Galinda was always so brash and emotional, and Elphaba rarely let herself be controlled by anything other than logic and information. Galinda wished she was more like her roommate.</p>
<p>“Well, I’ll certainly do all that I can to sort things out!” She said, because feigning confidence where she had none always came naturally to Galinda. She smiled a hollow smile, and prayed her eyes weren’t still glittering wet. Fiyero grinned back.</p>
<p>“You'd better because I'm not sure I can listen to you whine about how much you miss her any longer. Oh!” He started suddenly. “If you can sort whatever this is out with her by the weekend, you’re both invited to a bash just outside Shiz - courtesy of Avaric’s father’s carriages. It’s Halloween, obviously, so costumes are essential. Bring anything you want to drink, and something to throw on the bonfire.” Galinda perked up; she loved bonfires almost more than the balls and parties she was supposed to prefer. There was something so primal about sitting around the crackling, smoky mess of burning wood and sharing stories under the moonlight. Not to mention the scandal it would cause if word of her attendance at a bonfire got back to her parents.</p>
<p>“Who else is going?”</p>
<p>“As far as I know, just our circle. Avaric, Boq, Crope and Tibbet, Pfannee, Shenshen and Milla.”</p>
<p>“Boq?” She hadn’t seen much of him in the last month; presumably, he’d been focused heavily on his classes - the word from Crope was he was on scholarship and hadn’t done well in his end of year exams. “He’s coming?”</p>
<p>“He feels like a prisoner to his textbooks - I talked him into joining us for the night.”</p>
<p>“I’ll be there. And so will Elphaba.” Perhaps she shouldn’t have accepted on Elphaba’s behalf, particularly pre-apology, but she doubted her roommate would miss a bonfire with their friends to spite her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What the hell is this?” Galinda winced at her roommate’s tone: in hindsight, writing Elphaba a letter regarding the bonfire invitation might not have been the best idea she’d ever had. Especially as she’d made no mention of wanting to apologise. But she hadn’t wanted to scare Elphaba away from the conversation.</p>
<p>“We were invited to a bonfire this weekend. Fiyero said to mention it to you.” Elphaba crossed their room in a few easy strides and flopped down on her mattress.</p>
<p>“I meant this.” She said, shaking the paper roughly. “You couldn’t just ask me?” Galinda’s eyebrows skyrocketed at her roommate's bad mood. It wouldn’t have surprised her coming from anyone other than the woman in front of her. Galinda didn't appreciate the tone.</p>
<p>“I’d have loved to ask you, Elphaba.” She replied coolly. “But I haven’t seen you for nearly a week. Not in classes, not in the dining hall, and you don’t ever come back here until I’m long asleep.” She didn’t mention that she never fell asleep until Elphaba was safely in the room again; it didn’t seem like Elphaba was in the mood to appreciate her concern. “At what point should I have brought it up?” The room was silent, so Galinda returned to taking notes from her sorcery theory textbook. She was nearly finished by the time Elphaba spoke again.</p>
<p>“Are we going?” Her voice was quiet; Galinda paused at her nervousness. Was this a peace offering? Elphaba’s way of apologising for the week of complete silence. It hit her then, like a freight train. She was Elphaba’s best friend, in so much as Elphaba was hers. She probably hadn’t seen anyone at all for the past week. Elphaba was <em>lonely</em>. She wanted to be angry, that once again she’d been ignored in favour of Elphaba skulking around the old and unused parts of Shiz where no one would find her. But she couldn’t. Because Elphaba was lonely, and she didn’t know how to reach out, and she was trying anyway. And Galinda hadn’t even apologised yet. She didn’t deserve Elphaba, that much was evident.</p>
<p>“I am, yes.” She replied, her voice calm despite her inner turmoil. “Do you want to?”</p>
<p>“Well, I should. I don’t want it to appear like -” Galinda didn’t want to hear about their stupid ruse, or the level of control it had taken over their friendship. It had caused them too much strife already. She interrupted.</p>
<p>“Elphaba. Do you want to?” The was the briefest of pauses.</p>
<p>“Yes.” She said in the same soft, shy tone. Galinda smiled.</p>
<p>“Then yes, we’re going.” Perhaps they could be okay after all. It might be a slow process, and Lurline knows Galinda needed to keep better control of her temper. It seemed like a bad time to discuss their argument though, now that they were in a little bubble of tentative friendship, and she hated to pop it preemptively, so she let the rest of the evening pass in amicable silence. There was still plenty of time to have that difficult conversation.</p>
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